The only place safe enough is inside myself. Yeah I know, the demons dwell there to, but atleast I know these ones. I'm trying not to hide, but still that's all I can come up with when I fall.
I never meant it to be like this.. I thought I was on my way up, thought I had some kind of future that I could keep steady. I know I was wrong, but that doesn't mean that I don't fight. Fight is what I do every fucking day. Somehow trying to get things straight, get things to hold up for one more day.
I ain't much today. I know why you people left. 'Cause I couldn't give you the love you needed, the love you deserved. And then someone else came along, brought your light back, and made you survive. I can't be the one, can't be the shoulder you need to cry on, the hand to help you up.. I'm so sorry!
Love was never meant for me, not then, not now. God I try every day to get some kind of order back into my life, some kind of living.. ain't easy, never was. I'm just sad that this sickness inside took the ones I loved and still love away from me.
It was never meant to be, it was never meant to be.... I tell myself that, just to keep my head above the surface, and that's about enough.
"you couldn't hate enough to love"
- story of my life -
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